Days Like This

Looking at my posts, I realize that I have been neglecting to post to my own blog or to others. Then I look at what is going on in my life. My tiniest dog, a rescue who had a really horrible life before I found and brought him home. He had to have a major surgery to remove 12 of his teeth and 4 fistulas (holes in the mouth from teeth he has already had). Even there, he is not done, for he is a senior fellow, and he needs more oral surgery but our financial well is running dry. He also has kidney failure, likely from the teeth that were bad before we found and rescued him. I know he belonged to a drug person before, and there is no way that person is ever getting him back. So Mama (as I consider myself to my five chihuas and one cat and two goldfish) is cooking healthy food for the kiddos.

Then there is the man of my life, Richard, my significant other, who has had two cervical surgeries, and both have more or less failed, so the doctor was talking more surgeries, but I am taking him someplace else for another opinion of what can be done to help him. We will likely go to the VA since he is a vet, and he does have an attorney for a VA disability as well as being caused by his work since getting out. Anyway, I can only do so much to help each of my beloved ones.

I had a sore spot on the other previously non-cancerous breast, so I got a ultrasound, and now my doc is calling me as I think they want me to have a biopsy and it does show something irregular.

Now we are getting (or trying to get) a home on our own land – nothing expensive or fancy, but just comfortable, in Arizona. So looking at all the homes and telling the hubster all about them and getting hopes up for us both. And then I am starting to pack up things we don’t need, and I am redoing my file cabinet and also some nice chairs that I got for free that need work.

But at the end of each day, I stop and thank the Gods and spirits all for all the inspiration I encounter every single day in posts and the friendships I have built over the years. And especially to tell everyone I love how much they are loved. I don’t think the animals understand my words, but they definitely understand the things I do for them and the tones I use to talk to them. I never go to sleep no matter how tired I am until I tell everyone (pets and hubster) how much they are loved and give them all kisses. Life moves back too fast sometimes, and it is good to slow down and remember all the wonderful things we have learned in this life, the people we have loved, and to be sure to tell them all while we still can. I think of all the people who did hurt me, some very seriously physically and mentally, but I would not have the heart for others if I could not thank them at least in my soul for making me the person I am today. I have long believed we cannot really know compassion for others unless we have been through some life challenges, each one of us.

Today I went out in my side yard and I was so surprised and happy to see the whole yard full of beautiful wild violets blooming happily from the rain we have had. These are going with me along with the wild mint in my yard when we get moved. As I am looking around at this tiny and m0dest mobile home, I remember all the things I have put into it to make it a genuine home.

I have lived a very full life, and I want each and every one of you how much you have contributed to my life. I truly feel wealthy in a way that no gold or silver can ever buy. Consider that you each have received genuine thanks and love from me always. Thank you my friends.

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Heroes

When I saw the photo of this beautiful and diminutive lady in the newspaper, I was inspired to create her likeness in a quilt which is still not finished. There is something about finishing it that reminds me of her life, for her goal is unfinished, and her country of Myanmar is still unfinished in the sense of gaining freedom for her people, so in a way it seems appropriate to be unfinished. I will finish it I am certain, but I have to make some adjustments to it in the direction she is facing and the overall size, etc. of the quilt. Giving it texture will enhance the quilt greatly just as giving texture to life enhances it as well.

I love people who make a commitment in life that they will pursue despite whatever challenges or dangers they face in the process. Called “The Father of Democracy” by the people of the country, her father was assassinated when Aung San Suu Kyi was just two years old. Despite such heart-breaking challenges, she steadfastly stuck by her beliefs even though she was under house arrest for years and has faced unbelievable circumstances. Her husband and two sons had to move outside the country. When her husband was stricken with cancer, she was told that she could go to be with him in his time of need, but that if she did, she could never come back. What a heart-rending decision had to be made and what incredible sacrifices the whole family made.

Yes, she is one of my heroes. No matter how much I might believe in something, I am not sure I could ever have given so much to such an immense cause.

It is good to have heroes in this life as I have noted before. We all need to know that when we are called to do something difficult, there are others who have made a path for us to follow. Perhaps those in her country who are against her are just waiting out the time when she too will pass on. Although she won the Nobel prize during the time she lived under house arrest not much has changed in Myanmar to this day.

If the time comes that I have to stand up and fight for a cause in my lifetime that I too will have the courage to stay strong and be brave until my last moments on this earth. I long for the all of earth’s people to learn to work together for our mutual benefit, and to realize and respect that we are all sacred and here on this earth by some great design.